I'm home and kinda pitiful... :)

Well, the surgery was on Monday. It went well, and I got home from the hospital on Wednesday evening. If I'd had a choice I'd have stayed another day, if only for the relatively good sleep I got in the recliner in the hospital room.

I've had 2 children, a hysterectomy, and a gall bladder removed, so I'm no newbie to surgery. But I'm not going to splenda-coat it, this one was tough. I know abdominal surgery is always a hard recovery, but I hate feeling so vulnerable and pathetic.

My days have become a great quest to find a comfortable position that doesn't make my abdomen hurt like hell. The first night I went to sleep in our bed, but woke up at 4am needing to pee. AND I was lying flat on my back, even though I had several pillows under my head. So I went to get up and I couldn't budge myself. I had no stomach muscles to push off with. Try getting up from a flat-on-your-back position without using any stomach muscles. Impossible.

So I tried rolling to the side and swinging my legs over, but I couldn't roll on my side because it was too sore. I literally laid there for an hour trying different ways to get up, whimpering and feeling sorry for myself. Then finally at 5am I reluctantly woke Rudy and asked him to help me get up. He hopped right up and was very nice about it, but what a pain in the ass to be woken up 1 hour before he has to get up to go to work anyway. But he was great. Anyway, I went out to the loveseat in the living room and built myself a nest with pillows and that has been my domicile ever since. I slept there last night and though I can't say it was comfortable, at least I can get myself up when I need to.

All I want to do is veg and doze, but there is so much to do!! I'm supposed to "ambulate" (walk!) several times a day, do my breathing exercises every hour into the little breathing thingy they gave me (to build your lung capacity back), do my leg and ankle exercises (to prevent blood clots), then in the morning I have to take my pepcid, my liquid multi-vitamin, crush up this giant potassium pill and mix it into applesauce, drink plenty of fluids (80 oz./day! I can barely swallow an ounce at a time), be sure to get all my pureed foods in, and drink my protein shakes.

The pureed foods are interesting. I ordered a cute little red mini-food processor online, and it was waiting for me when I got home from the hospital. My sister came and stayed with me for a few hours on Thursday, and she helped me get it set up and figure out how it works, and we pureed some things to get me started. My first pureed food was cottage cheese with some pears in it. Kinda tasty, actually.

Here's what I had on Thursday, my first day home:

• 1 oz. applesauce
• 1.5 oz. peach yogurt
• 1 vanilla protein shake
• 16 oz. decaf tea
• 1.5 oz. cottage cheese and pear puree
• dinner - 1.5 oz. lowfat ricotta and 1 oz. of a delicious tomato puree with italian seasonings that my sister had simmering for me all day
• At night Rudy cut up some strawberry-kiwi jello for me with some skim milk over it

I need to point out that it was TOUGH getting all this down. You should see what 1.5 oz. ricotta and 1 oz of tomato puree looks like on a plate. Like two little pitiful tiny scoops. But it was soooo filling and tasted like a great Italian meal to me.

Today I tried pureeing a scrambled egg and some lite cream cheese, and that was yummy. That was my dinner tonight, along with 1 oz. of applesauce. And I was more full than I used to feel eating a Big Mac Extra Value Meal.

Just with that tiny bit of food, I am so stuffed I'm wondering if I shouldn't try eating all they say you're supposed to eat if it's too much for you. U.S. Bariatric provides you with a great nutritionist that you can email with questions - I'll have to ask her that.

I'm getting sore sitting at the computer desk, so I have to go back to my nest. I'll write more this weekend.